The Boucle is a lie

***This post is also published on my website blog. I will be cross posting for the foreseeable future.***

When one thinks of boucle yarn, one thinks of soft, elegant, feminine. Nothing but sugar, spice, and everything nice. "The soft texture of boucle yarn adds a feminine touch to career wear without the need for ruffles or bows." -Appleseed's

This boucle yarn, however is none of those things, despite the characteristic loops.

While dreaming up this yarn, I began to think of everything it meant to be 'woman'. Our expectations are to be soft, elegant, and we are often pressured into being those things. Often we mask ourselves as those things by wearing prettier clothes, doing our hair just right, adding either a little or a lot of makeup. We further this facade through a lot of our behaviours as well. We smile and nod. We take a deep breath when interrupted, and allow the other person to finish their thought, sometimes allowing the conversation to veer and completely loose our place and therefore our voice in the matter. We apologize for taking up space. All of these things to be "perfectly feminine."

Using the coarsest top(likely lincoln long wool) in my fibre stash, I spun the loop singles. Using one of the coarser fibres (a corriedale - yes, that's a coarser one ;) ) I had in my stash I spun both the core and the wrapping yarn. Yes, this yarn is properly constructed as a boucle. This yarn, while it looks perfectly feminine, is harsh, and wiry, and scratchy, and not something you want to cuddle up to.

Speaking for myself (as truly I can only do that) I know more often than not by combination of my stature and soft features, people find it odd when I present in a way that they "just don't see in me." I'm cute, and dainty, and sweet. When I choose heavier makeup, and when I want to wear something a little out of the box for a fine boned, gentle girl. I wanted a sharp faux hawk for my wedding day, but was convinced a "softer look" was more feminine. I wanted a side shave hair cut, and the hair dresser softened it. Because someone like me is soft, and feminine... I've been dress shopping and when I choose something a little more out there, I'm greeted with that "look," the one that says "what the hell are you even trying to prove?" All of this experience has made me a bit rigid, a bit abrasive, a bit harsh. But I hide it behind a facade of soft femininity so the world is more comfortable. If you get really close you will know, but from a far you can't see it.

~Kara

Spin heart, spin.

This. This picture. Does it make your fingers move, just so slightly?  Does it make your foot tap out a perfect, steady rhythm? Was the first thing you noticed the pile of lovely dyed fleece on the floor?  Or was it one of the wheels?  Maybe you even noticed the pile of mini skeins natured dyed into fabulous 1970's colours sitting on the back counter.  If you encountered any of these things, then you get it. 
This picture is the Master spinner level 1, taught my Marj Sojstrom, class room.
Master spinner?
yes! Master spinner!
Wait, what are you talking about? there are no bikes.
Okay, lets reverse a bit.  

Once upon a story… One day while cruising Crafster.org -which I happened to stumble upon through a post on diaperswappers.com- clicking through most recent post thumbnails, I see this yarn.  And I think to myself 'Ooh what pretty yarn! I wonder where they bought it, and what did they make with it?!' *click*  *scroll scroll* wait.  WAIT.  WHAT?!?!!!! You MADE that YARN?!!!?!!!  I didn't know you could make yarn!!! I wanna make yarn!!  Honey look look!! This person MADE YARN.  MADE it!  But how??  Searching and a few 100 questions later, I discovered it was as simple as a dowel with a disc on it, and some wool.  So the first chance I got I went out and bought myself a heavy drop spindle (the fancy term for the dowel/disc thingy) and about 2oz of what I think was merino roving.  From that first finger flick I was hooked.  I still have that yarn.  I dyed it with koolaid.  It's been felted.  It's a pretty sorry mess to be honest, but it was my first.  I love that yarn.  And just to still your curiosity, here it is:

Okay so fast forward two and a half years, and here we are. Two and half years of spinning, not on a bike, but on a spinning wheel.  Making yarn for the sake of making yarn.  Putting wool to the wheel and letting my heart guide me. Nearly two years ago, I learned of a place where people who love fibre, who love to spin, who love yarn, get together and for just over 1 week, they learn and teach and socialize with people who get it.  This year, I finally got to go.  I took the Master Spinner level 1 course.  And this blog is my journey.  And I thought that, maybe, if I shared it with the world, someone out there will stumble upon it and discover that they too can create yarn, with their own two hands.  And fall in love, find themselves, find something that moves them.  The way I found myself, fell in love with my wheel, and found something that moves me.

~Kara